'Tis good to be the King, Speed King that is...

Friday morning while I was at the shop picking up my centerlock adapter, MOAB Mark mentioned he'd be camping and getting an evening ride in at Chickasaw. He had to be there early to set up his MOAB trailer and with the long drive, it was the easiest option for him. Saturday came and rain was predicted, though it didn't rain in Franklin until I was 20 minutes into the drive to the course. I couldn't let Mark camp all by his lonely, so I told 8-ball Mike and he couldn't let me and Mark camp alone, and it rolled down the line. The rain didn't let up, lightening started, and the course and parking lots were flooded. We settled in, set up awnings outside the MOAB trailer and cracked some brew and dug into Mark's spicy cheese&sausage tray. Sharpie came out with a keg of Sly Rye Porter from the sponsor and pop corn. H. came out for a bit to hang out and brought us pizza. Around 11PM the skies cleared up a bit and the rain let off.

Morning came and I considered changing from 34x17 to 34x18 to better gear for the muddy and slick conditions, but that sounded like too much effort. Besides I hate to mess with perfection and the bike was feeling dialed Friday. If I touched it now I'd only be plagued with mechanicals, so I left it and just mentally prepared for the fruits of my stupid decision. We moved camp to the top of the start line and Sharp cooked up eggs. We helped set up the Swiftwick booth and got about our rituals. I picked out the weapons of choice: one red and one white OTC compression sock, I am truly a fashion icon. Then Mike, OldGreg, and I went for a spin. We rode a few miles down the road to try to wake the legs up, ended up over heating, removed several layers, and then went to hang out before the race.

Going into the race I had my money on Meanjoe (aka Adam). He has amazing handling skills and is starting to get some speed and confidence. He and Jeff have partaken in the J5 Training Plan this year. Race all 3 snakes, grind gravel, drink beer. I must say they are star pupils. Pump Track Jim is also always a darkhorse on fast lap races, great handling skill, speed, and lactic endurance built up from his pump track training. A pro from Texas was toeing the line, which had several people all jacked up about it. I found it funny. Why would someone drive from so far to race a bunch of local yocals that don't really care about anything except having fun? Expert class, well they care, SS class, we're mostly out for shenanigans.

Given the conditions I was prepared to eat a lot of mud, be half blind from splatter, and hug a few trees. SS has 26 racers, one of the biggest classes turning out for the muddy wet day. The horn goes and we all go splashing our way down the lane. I'd started in the 2nd of 3 rows as I'm never one to blow off the line, I prefer to warm up slowly. We take off, I'm mid pack, down the gravel road, sharp left turn, then back up the pavement before the dropping into the chute. I made my way up past all the drafting boys, giving my teammates little pushes now and then to get them going. I came up to Adam D. and gave him a nudge, he asked if I wanted the chute first, I say nah, and gave him some room. I look to my left and see Gary Collins (a HAMMER) rolling up with the notorious stans leak sound "sssfwft, sssfwt, sssfwt" I let him in, give him plenty of room fearing his front would roll off on the steep mucky downhill, then plunged in. I had Adam D. some CCC kid (Cory), a full sup, locked out gearie Wood-N-Waver, and Gary the Hammer in front of me and a pack of hungry wolves behind me. Gary's wheel finally went out and he slid down in front of me, I called out to make sure he was ok and he hollered back "I'm good go go!" I made chase to catch Adam D. I had the gearie dude inbetween us, up the slick techy rock climb he fell, I made a move up and to the right, then he fell in my path trying to stand up in the slick muddy rocks, I dismounted and ran it like cross, hopped onto Adam's wheel and we made chase to catch the CCC dude. Adam D. got around the CCC kid and I was on their wheel as we made our way around the slick, slimy river trail. Adam D. offered to let us pass, but I yelled up to just pick it up a notch to hold back the swarming pack until the field where it would be safer (given the conditions) to pass. Once there I opened it up and didn't look back. CCC Corey came with me and I tried to gap him every hill. Eventually he popped in the Trail of Tears and I had a comfortable gap. The race wheels and the Speed King tires were hooking up like crazy in the conditions, shedding mud like dog fur and I hammered on.

Starting the second lap I had about a 2 minute gap on the pack and I was starting to get nervous. I had no gauge of speed. Am I slowing down? Am I going to hard? Dammit I hate being the rabbit!! Lap two had completely changed the course. It was still really muddy, but it was a bit drier mud and it wasn't shedding near as well. The tires weren't hooking up as nicely as they were before and I had some near calls. I tried to just stay steady and keep it upright. Then I caught site of Meanjoe. He was coming. He'd been trapped in the pack and I'd really hoped he'd stay there but the little bastard made it through on his 29" Monkey. I held him off for the next 4 miles but he was closing the gap. He finally caught me at the base of Rick Harmon's trail. I'd kick it on every hill to try to regap and wear him down, but he'd yo-yo back up. I crossed a small wooden plank bridge and had the bike come out from underneath me and I hit the deck hard. I got up and back on with Meanjoe on my heals asking if I was ok. I decided to just ride steady and finish and told MJ to pass if he wanted, he was content to ride with me as he said he really didn't have anything left after working so hard to catch me (he closed down a 2 minute gap!) and we rode together chatting the last mile and a half agreeing to just sprint it out. Out of the woods and up the hill and I took off with all I had, MJ hot on my heals. I expected him to come flying around any second, but I was able to hold him off. Yazoo Brew Racing took 1 & 2.



Congrats to all of the crew. Not everyone had a great race, but I think everyone had a great time. I tend to excel in the adverse conditions (mostly because I find them to be the most fun) and regularly get my butt handed to me in perfect conditions. Guess you could say I'm a mudder (Some might say I'm a mudder fu**er). So Mikey and JasonG, don't sweat the small stuff. OldGreg, PTJim, Jeff thanks for coming out and playing in the mud. MJ - dude you are killing it, hopefully now you'll have a bit more confidence in yourself and you'll attack sooner. Oh, and I won't use my Jedi powers to give you leg cramps anymore. Sharpie, you F-N-rock! Thanks for coming out to support us and cooking for us and bringing the beer. Yazoo ladies, thank you for all the cheering, photos, and fun. Derf, though I never saw you on the hill I heard you each time, thanks for the cheers. Hennessey - thanks for not tackling me on the start of lap 2. Mark it was a blast too hang out but what the exactly are you doing in this photo?


Adam D and I have been racing in the same class now for about 3 years. We typically have a standing bet on each race we do, the first time was for a dollar bill in his spokes (he barely nipped me at the finish that year), the next was for a butterfly spokey dokey at a cross race (I got that one) and this one was the loser had to give their number plate with a special hand written note on the back to a victor.



I'm really proud of MJ and I really think he should have won it, but he says he had nothing left. Either way it was a great race that was fun from start to finish, but I'm most proud of the fact that I got the fastest lap time of the entire 2 lap classes. To that I credit my Hodge wheels, the speed kings.

Some more photos from the race:

SS start, Adam D. flying off the front

SS Start, me and Mikey

Preparing to drop the chute, Adam D in lead

8-ball down the shoot

Pump Track Jim
Jeffy

Mark "pushing" Jeff :-)

Old Greg finishing up

The Crew pre-awards

Awards
Lovely Ladies

Magic Mud Defying Socks Rock

Is it 4.20 or 4.2D

I got the last piece to one of my new puzzles today so I can let Dicky in on the phear fjear shall fear. Hodge built me up a set of supa-pimp race wheels. "meh" is what I can hear Dicky saying, but he's not really paying attention yet what with all his limited brain power going towards fashionable fanny packs. The wheels have centerlock hubs so I've been waiting on an adapter to hold my 6-bolt rotor onto the front. I tested the rear out Tuesday. It's way light, stiff like I like it, and held up to my beatings in the rocks with nary a whimper. With the old heavy front wheel still employed, I felt like I was riding a loaded wheel barrel all night just from the extreme weight differences in wheels. To use one of Ben's phrases, I was "mule kicking" every hop. The front gets finished up and installed tonight. Expect some hilarity at the race Sunday as I'm sure I'll be catching way more air than I'm used to. Oh, and AMAZING acceleration too. Yup, I have just been enabled to get in the way EVEN faster, watch out for the "Hodge turn" at the start.

I've been a devout stout wheel believer since bending my first light weight rim on it's first ride out in Tsali, where there isn't anything to hit that should even bend a rim. Not taco, not fold, but bent the side down. I fixed it with some pliers and rode it for another year and a half, but the braking surface was hosed and any big bump would re-bend the rim. I ride a 27lbs rigid SS. I am at the furthest end you can be on from a weight weenie like Senior Dickster. I make Ivory build me heavy duty bomb-proof wheels for all my rides. But now, thanks to Hodge, I have a set of super light, super stiff, super strong, hand built race wheels. I've lost 4lbs off the bike in that single swap. 4lbs of rotational weight. Oh yeah, baby, I'll be going nowhere even faster now!

1800 grams. I don't even know what that means but that's what I got in wheel weight now. That's the scary part, the curmudgeonly anti-weight weenie me has been told things like "gram" this and "less rotational" that for so long without me batting an eye, but now I'm starting to get it. I felt so spun out in the flats and while climbing on 34x17 Tuesday that I'm tempted to toss a 16t cog on the rear for Sunday's race. I can feel it now, the weight weenie force is strong. I was even looking at a titanium SS frame this morning, thinking maybe throw a carbon fork on there, carbon bar, carbon Noir crank, some ti pedals, get it down under 19lbs... hmmm.... Yeah don't just fear the massive increase in my speed, fear my potential to fall into weight weenieness. Phear charts of weights and measures, power outputs, gain ratios, calculations, and advanced calculus with some diffEQ thrown in for good measure overtaking the blog. Yep, don't just fear the speed.

Continuing going against the grain of my fabric, I splurged and got a second set of rubber and some used brakes so all I have to do is swap wheels and not mess with changing rotors and tires between rims. Just so you kids don't forget the wheels will remind you, there's a new Speed King baby (with protection of course).

Stay tuned for updates, if I can't break these wheels then they will be guaranteed to last someone with real skills many seasons. Call Hodge at the shop and order up a set for someone you love or show up to SSUSA/DSG and try to win yourself a pair. All I know is after lugging my old wheels around the course last Saturday I'll be glad to be rocking weight weenie style at the race.

Wankers

The free WakeNBake bib when registering for DSG/SSUSA supplies have run out (kinda like their beer supply) but fear not you still have time to register and word is a Fish fry has been added.

A little birdie told me that a member of the Wake Crew called and said to tell the Yazoo crew that "they were gonna bring it to DSG". I'm not sure what the "it" is that they are going to bring, but you can bet it won't be beer. We're almost 4 months into the '08 racing year and I've not seen sight of a free beer from that crew yet. I have seen many of their crew hanging around the Yazoo beer coolers though.

I suppose they are meaning "their A game" when they said "it", but there will be plenty of fast people there, what we need is fast people with lots of beer (we're bringing Yazoo Kegs people!) that can "bring it" as well as "drink it" and "kick it". The wankers will be in their tents sleeping by 10PM, where as we'll be up till 10AM then throwing down on the race. True beer team style. Lucky for them they have Rebecca on their team to represent. Word is she's racing in only the team bib too. Meow!

*Disclaimer: Too all those out there that actually believe there is a rift between beer teams, relax, the crews are tight. We are just starting the smack season. DSG and SSUSA are going to rock and you'll have two of the best local breweries supplying brew, Yazoo and Terrapin, Yazoo will just have more beer and a bigger party. (Heh heh, love ya Mikey!)

Restricted Area

Well I was hoping to release some information today that I've been withholding from the masses for a while now, but I'm going to have to delay their revealing until a few more loose ends get tied up. Wouldn't want to jinx anything now would I? But let me just say that fjear equates to eye holes cut into a sheet that is worn over ones head to scare little kids, whereas what I have to reveal is akin to that temperature dropping, swirling mist, Electronic Voice Phenomena creating, ghastly apparition that has driven so many completely mad with fear. When I told a portion of this classified information to a local shop owner he was visibly shaken to his core, and no, not with laughter, with phear. The phear that fjear will fear.

The legs haven't been feeling it this week. Not sure if it's just a down week, a bug working through my system, or some how I've just lost what little ability I had to ride a bike. Maybe it's all the road riding I've had to do due to all the rain lately that my brain and body are shutting down for lack of inspiration. I did, however, finally manage to eek out some time on dirt. gRant, Old Greg and I headed down to Fayetteville Saturday to pre-ride the DSG and SSUSA home course the Cotton Mill Preserve. Either direction they run SSUSA is going to be a fun fit inducing romp. The trail doesn't give you a chance to really rest, it's all go. It is a full body SS course. There are ear to ear grin making descents, with rocks,roots, fish rocks and the dreaded Hennessey Gulch. Yeah it's going to be a fun time in the hills fo' sho!

150 Years

Mail day yesterday. My package of PC-58's and new old stock Pearl Izumi M4's were in, but I also had a notice slip for a second package. Second package? I didn't order anything else. Turns out it I got a surprise from dad.

Appointed 6-1-1971, Dad has been a firefighter my entire life. He's currently a Battalion Chief on Third Shift. I have many memories of the fire halls, fires, the smell of smoke on his clothes, playing on the fire trucks, Pluggie the fire hydrant shaped robot, the big Dalmatian dog suited mascot, water bucket hose fights, Christmas at the fire house, the late night phone ringing and hearing dad head out for 3 alarm fires, and many others. Like dad locking me in the holding cell or escorting me out of 5th hour history class in high school reading me my rights. It got me out of school early and made me the talk of the class for a while.

Back before I had my own car I had a $500 1982 Honda CM250 motorcycle and would get home from work to hear the scanner go off and I'd drive it over to the fire scene to hang out and watch dad work. Sometimes my step mom would ride over with me. One time she got stuck on the back when she about severed her pinky finger with a serrated bread knife and she wouldn't believe me that she needed stitches*. I had to take her to the fire station for dad to tell her. At the fires I'd usually end up sitting and watching Scotty run the pumper while dad disappeared into the smoke and flame filled house with the hose crew. He's been blown out of windows and once got into a wreck when his rescue truck was heading lights on to a fire through a 4-way stop with a cop going cross direction without his lights. Dad and his driver were injured but still managed to get the jaws of life out and save the policeman. He's a calm under pressure, trained to keep emotions at bay, a smart ass, usually good for a $20, did I mention smart ass?, and a hero to me. Though I think the reputation of his mustache precedes him.

Check out the 'stache on this young punk from the 70's. I even have memories of that car. Pretty cherry huh?

Since this is a bike blog, here's a photo of firefighters and bikes:

I think every bike I had up until my Sears Free Spirit 12 Speed** was built and hidden in the fire house until Christmas morning or my birthday. Big wheels, my green machine, my Sears Free Spirit BMX "dirt" bike, my Schwinn Stingray (red and white like the fire trucks) all put together in the fire house. Dad bought me the 12 speed when I was 13 or so on a Friday night after our regular routine of Happy Joe's Pizza then Sandburg Mall outing for caramel corn and a Sears visit. Purchased at Sears for $99, if I remember the hang tag accurately. Blue and fast and dad had me ride it home (that was the deal for me to be able to get it.) I still have that bike, thanks to Dad keeping it safe in the garage attic after college. Hopefully someday it'll be brought back to life as my daily SS commuter once I work my way down the need list.

So, congrats on the milestone Papa Ted. Here's to 37 years of basement saving and firehouse spaghetti.

* As a child I had so many stitches I was on first name basis with the ER crew. Once, while sitting in the back of dad's car at a gas station, I was messing with my skateboard and a swiss army knife and I sliced my thumb wide open. In the ER the nurse asked why I had my hand up. I explained to her that it was pulsing blood out so I was applying pressure and raised it over my heart to help stop the bleeding. I think I was 13, so I was a bit of a "stitch" expert. Could even take them out myself.

** Sears Free Spirit 12-speed. It is lugged steel, still fully functional, weighs 45lbs, and is the last bike my parents purchased for me. Though I wouldn't be opposed to them getting me one of these so I can build it up with 700c disc wheels, fenders, and a flat bar for commuting.

Canary Sings Mockingbird Tunes

Watched the evening news last night (I watch it for the weather) and the lead story was diesel prices. Remember, you heard it here first folks.

"The national average for a gallon of diesel is about $4. In January, it was $3.30. New England has the most expensive diesel at $4.11 a gallon.

Experts said consumers will ultimately pay the price for high price at the pump for truckers."

5 years ago $20 more than filled the tank. Each year the average tank has increased by $30. Four years ago when I got my car $18 filled it, now it's $38-ish. See a trend? It's kind of like taxes, once they raise them, they never lower them.

I'm not preaching doomsday (it doesn't need my help). On the contrary, I'm preaching it's time to wake up and say no to higher prices. How do you say no? Like any consumer issue, stop buying. Not that one day crap. We live in a car society and we rely on our cars, until people's habits change, that is going to be our reality. But you don't need to drive the mile or two to the store, walk or bike there. Make it a family outing and get the kids outside and away from the TV/video games. My dad used to take us out for a bike ride around the neighborhood after dinner. He'd stop and talk to neighbors out taking care of their yards or walking. I still have fond memories of those times, how will your kids remember you?

Another "say no" tip is to group errands into sections of town and try to do them all the same day, cutting down on multiple driving trips. Walk or maybe even take a bike so you can park close, then use the bike to hit the other nearby stores.

If you have to drive to work, try walking to lunch instead of driving there. Those short trips with stop and go traffic just eat your gas and your money.

The dollar is weak and prices are going to be higher than yesteryear, but that doesn't mean we need to be sheeple and keep dumping our hard earned pennies (which seems to be what the dollar is worth nowadays) into Big Oil's (Mr. Record High Profits in the BILLIONS!!!!) fat pockets.

Like Marley said "Get up, stand up: don't give up the fight!"

(ok, that's about it for my anti-oil price tirade. Back to the regularly scheduled smack talk and bike gibberish. I can't change oil, but we can. Even if these tips don't bring prices down, they will help you save at the pump. People Get Ready. )

All the news with Gary Gnu

Friday's post was from the heart and the way I see it, but I'd like to share some news and views on things.

Suppose a tank of fuel cost you $150 to travel ~350 miles, how would that change your driving habits? Would you take public transit more, continue to drive, carpool, or pick up a bike? What if it were $150 to fill up a tank now with predictions of the price going up even higher within the next couple weeks? I already ride as much as I can and try not to drive, mostly for exercise and more efficient commuting, but also to save fuel costs and vehicle wear and tear. Well Friday night the "suppose" became "does". That's right diesel has hit $3.99 in Nashville. Some areas such as Brentwood it's over $4 a gallon. I got to drive the car Saturday into town to attend a certification course and the gas light was on so I stopped and put the $20 I had with me in the tank and it filled it halfway, halfway!! The truck $20 wouldn't even fill a 1/4 tank. Diesel is the life blood of goods and services. It's also supposed to take less to refine and be a more efficient, cheaper burning fuel. Diesel prices haven't come down since gas prices started crawling up a few years ago. Not because oil is $100 a barrel, but because the dollar isn't worth anything any more. If the dollar weren't so diluted, the price of oil would be 50-55 dollars a gallon. Remember that when gas prices creep up, it's not purely oil's fault it's also the dollars. Expect products to skyrocket unless the come out with battery operated Semi trucks. Trickle down economics at work. Maybe this'll hit home: That $400 rebate from the federal government is 2 tanks of fuel*.

Last week I became an official Swiftwick sponsored rider. I'm not really sure what that means yet as my team of high priced lawyers and managers are currently scouring and debating the epic length contract to make sure my typical 12.5 Million dollar salary is being properly satiated. While they** debate***, I'll sit back and be assured of one thing. That I will still be buying and sending Swiftwick socks out to friends and loved ones (speaking of loved ones, X-Mater what size is that sweaty hoof-foot of yourn?) because I believe in the product. I've been wearing them since '05 and have been hooked ever since. I love and believe in the product and this recent sponsorship isn't going to change that. I'm honored they think enough of my piddly little self to even offer it up, whatever it turns out to be.

It's kinda like Walz Caps. I have no affiliation with them other than being turned on to their product from a friend then purchasing several hats after the fact. A post on my blog about my ill-shaped corn kernel melon and my flappy cappy led to Jen from Walz sending me a new and larger designed hat, probably under the guise of customer service, but really she's just good people. It matters not that I am threatened with "Disciplinary Action" if I'm caught on film without a Walz Cap (only 3 people will get that, 2 of whom read this blog and one who has to have it read to him but I'm told he likes the pictures). She and her mom are the company and they do great work and are super, super people. People and products like that are rare, so I try to spread the love by telling all 6 of you about their great products. Jen will still catch me trying to pay full retail for a cap or two and probably send me an extra hat, but I try to pass that love on to fellow cyclists. Like Jen once said: "Just like a nice cold beer, Walz Caps are best when shared with friends."

To be honest, both Swiftwick and Walz Caps are best when shared with friends, but I still prefer them worn on my parts. Yup, I said parts. Now where did I put that riding crop...

*: Before you all line up and tell me to sell it and get a more efficient car, bare in mind no Prius can haul 15,000 lbs. The truck serves an important function and purpose. It's not like I'm driving an SUV to haul 2 kids to soccer practice because I can't drive and need a huge rigid framed death ram to protect myself (and kill/mame others in safety crinkle cars). I own a fuel efficient small car, it's currently getting driven a ton by someone who would otherwise be in the poor house trying to keep the diesel running with work and school in 2 different cities. Just think of me as the canary and it's getting very hard to breath.

**they: They as in them. Yup. Them.

*** debate: uh, there's no lawyers or contract or millions. Pretty much I'll just get to live in a room full of wool socks. Kinda like Scrooge McDuck's money pool, only mine will be full of wool goodies. I'll swim around and take photos to post up and aggrivate Dicky who will only be able to get a cotton sock sponsor and who wants to swim in cotton (despite what the softer side of Sears has to say).