Stumbling Around in the Woods

Being prone to sinus issues and just recovering from a bout of congestion, I decided to not ride the past 2 days and instead get some hill climbing/hiking done with the pup. It would also help resolve some boredom. The addition of insulated bibs and mud boots gave me some resistance training. H. was able to join us on our hike today, which we followed up with an equine trail ride since the valley in the back sheltered us from the cold, blustery wind allowing the sun to bake us in it's warmth. It almost felt like a warm spring day back in the valley. Cresting the hill though, was a rude reminder of it being mid winter still. A few single digit nights with highs in the teens are forecast for the next few days.


Two water falls were discovered during our hike. The one pictured above I'd not seen before on previous hikes.


This is the "lake" that they (as in "them") marketed the parcel of land as having "lake front" property. Really not much more than a glorified pond. Dish and the horses didn't seem to mind as they all had fun splashing around in it today.

I unplugged the W.I.M.P.Tech electronic coach module from the bike and carried it with me on the hike. Apparently, it was able to determine the wattage from the rubber heel of my mud boots and compare that with the terrain, mph, heart rate, and exertion levels achieved from hiking, lunging, and hill running. Below is today's beta. I still marvel at the W.I.M.P.Tech's intricate graphing abilities.

Misery Now Has Company

Day two of the Misfit Psycles W.I.M.P. Tech diet. I downloaded some graph calculation updates and a new voice enhancement and got them installed in the W.I.M.P. module while drinking some coffee and reading the rags. The voice enhancements now offer a more personal coaching experience. Though absent are the typical Bruyneel-esque "Venga! Venga! Venga!" or his Ghent-Wevelgem styled "You're the best, eh George. The best!" The W.I.M.P. Tech vocal enhancement offers custom lines of inspiration, such as:

"You could walk up this hill faster. Seriously, get off and walk, you're embarrassing me."

"It's a wonder mommy lets you off the sidewalk."

and

"A few more workouts like these and we might get to forgo the training wheels. Though, I wouldn't get your hopes up."

I could really feel the pain and humiliation in todays workout better than yesterdays W.I.M.P.y experience. A few more modifications and updates and this electronic coaching device will be ready for the masses. Here's the 'beta' from todays ride. The updated graphing calculations make the results of my efforts more legible than ever before.

Testing the Kerkovian Method

Not having the finances (nor attention span) for any SRM/Powertap/heartrate reading/wattage determining gizmos, Coach Lil' P was kind enough to hook me up with one of the new top secret and still in R&D phase Misfit Psycles Workout Improvement Measuring Psyclometer, or W.I.M.P. Tech as it is more commonly referred.

The balmy 34 degrees and somberly gray cloudy day here North of Nashvegas seemed apropos for giving W.I.M.P. Tech a go. I suited up in my woolly goodness and headed off, forgoing my iPod and water bottle. Such distractions just lead to weakness anyway. Finding solace and solitude in the North Nashie hills, the W.I.M.P. Tech electronic coach kept me in the precise zones to maximize my mediocrity. No wasted effort here. No more wondering if I'm doing enough to properly hurt my chances of attaining any sort of improvement. The basis of the W.I.M.P. Tech design is to help one become even more mediocre in a more efficient manner. Check the numbers (or "beta") if you don't believe me. Graphs don't lie, though this one may need to spend a little more time in calibration class.

Livin' La Vida Sharpie

After a 46 minute ramble left on my therapist gRant's voicemail, I quickly called Caesar to inform him the solitude and tranquility of the first 8 days of 09 were just but a mere gift. Back to my daily 3 am mental jab phone calls and playing up his paranoia (yes they are).

Finally arriving at my place of arrival, plans for 2012 were laid in stone (or at least Illustrator and some html code). Hanging out with Sharpie is always good for the soul. It's also good for the stomach, fresh cabbage and carrot stir fry. The hours between 10 and 2 were spent knocking around some ideas and working on a few projects, all the while bantering about life, living, and dealing with those who cause increased blood pressure.

"Wait, I thought you were all beer and bikes? What's with this hippy group hug crap?"

Ah, reader, you know me too well. The plans for the day just used "work" as an excuse to get together for bikes and beer. See, lil' V was out at school for Thursday, freeing Sharp up for a few hours so we could work on a project (laptops + wifi yo). But why waste a whole day working?

Eastside Hennessey, Sharp, and me rolling out the school bus.

"Whoa! Daddy brought clowns today!"

The look of jealousy from car victims and a friendly wave from BikeMan.

Buckling up the bundled bundle.

Ready for transport. Pink Wooby powers activated.

Heading home in the bike lane.

Treated to hand popped, custom popcorn creations. This one was the bomb. Peanut butter, brown sugar, confectionery sugar (added for grip), and other secret ingredients. Yo Gabba Gabba!

Hanging out with the Cricket was the highlight of the day. Definitely a cross training activity trying to keep up with the bundle of excess energy. We hung out until mommy came home at 7 then high tailed it to the brewery to meet up with squish and friends. Thanks for the beers Jeffy, as usually it's much appreciated and too kind. It was great to get to chat with Wendy too. She's a bad-ass female mtb rider (and Jeffy's much better half) and it was interesting hearing her take on some of the local trails and what they offer different skill level riders. A perspective all trail activists should take into consideration.

No photos of the night time shenanigans (Hey Mike, what's that place you like to eat with all that goofy sh*t on the walls?) as 25 degrees + frostbike on 2 fingertips made glove removal a need only based operation while out riding. We ended the day where it began. Another East Side memory made.

Can I Borrow a Cooper?

WARNING (Airsaggo and krs1): The following images are disturbing (for you clean freaks) and could cause sweating, convulsions, facial ticks, and uncontrolled urges to run home and clean your bikes. View at your own risk. You've been warned.

Snaps of Black Death in battle scar mode. That pinched tube will be patched and repacked into the pack of doom. Or as Jeffy likes to refer to it as my "pouch". Please refer to it by it's proper name though, the Fanny Pack of Doom!

Hating backpacks, camelbaks, and even disliking the wingnut, the Fanny Pack of Doom allows me to carry a full size 8mm allen, park multitool, 3 tubes, 3 co2, Crank Bros pump, extra chain links, power links, zip ties, tire levers, patch kit and still have room for luxury items. I don't have to fiddle with trying to crawl out of it when wet/sweaty/muddy to access items, it can be spun to the side or front when working on the bike making it easy to get to things and put things back, it doesn't rub holes in my shorts, it can be tightened to act as a hernia belt (talk with your doctor to determine whether or not you are healthy enough for a faux hernia belt), and most importantly the weight doesn't raise my center of gravity, or get in my way. (wow, such impassioned prolific prose about a fanny pack, defensive much Thad?)

Combine the Fanny Pack of Doom with my Epic Designs frame bag and you've got the basis for a solid ultra-endurance set up. Kind of the bike version of the old school station wagon before the rear facing 3rd row seats. Fake or real wood paneling optional. Though this would be my pick.


I knocked off the dirt with my pit kit brush (a favorite and much used gift from the EMIL 2 xmas's ago), hand washed with warm water and dish detergent, then a coating of LUST. Not quite what I'd refer to as 'pulling a Cooper', but it meets my clean bike criteria. For one, my bike sat covered in filth for 3 days, Cooper'd never last that long with a dirty bike. Secondly, I don't have one of those magnifying bendy pixar lamp thingies nor the hepa filtered, O.R. sterile operating environment complete with bike autoclave to burn off all contaminants.

I prefer to just knock the dirt off and go over the frame for cracks/new rust then focus on the drive train, which is the one area I'm probably more Cooper than Cooper and more Keith than krs1. Although I'd never move someone else's seatpost height to prevent their saddle from touching my bars/brake lever/imaginary no fly buffer space surrounding the bike, there are some (cough *Keith* cough) people out there who might.


Even my 'clean' pics bother you don't they Coop? That line of dirt around the headset, the dirt on the brake adapter, the scratches in the finish? Pleasant dreams.

The Wisdom of Papa Chen

pinching pennies by snake creek sink camping
photo credit: krs1
(Merry Christmas Pedur, figured you could have lots fun with this one)

Things have been very different the last 4 months. It's been (and continues to be) a struggle as finding a job has been illusive. I'm stuck in between the not hiring quickly corporate world and the 'you're too qualified and won't stick around long so not worth out time' world of Lowes/UPS/Kmart/Taco Bell. Kind of dumb. I could not list my recent employment history, but how would one explain not working since 1991? I guess my resolute manner probably nixed one opportunity. It started out with a question of "Are you and anti-tie guy, Thad?" Then ended with me stating "If getting a job came down to whether or not I had a tie on and not based upon my qualifications, then it's probably not the job for me."


At the same time, I've become extremely wealthy on the friend front. Despite it taking several weeks for me to feel like wanting to interact in public again, they've all been there for me. Even yesterday, sitting drinking coffee and checking email waiting for a response from yet another human resourcer to contact me with a phone interview time, an email from facebook came out of the blue. Just by coincidence the first friend I can recall ever hanging out with happened to wonder if I was in the system and searched, finding me on, of all days, my birthday. His family moved away when we were young and we lost contact. Then out of the blue, I happened to be visiting the hometown one Friday night during college and he happened to roll up in the parking lot of K-mart and find me. The good ones are always the best ones.


The rest of my birthday went well. I started to chisel a little bit of the dried mud off Black Death so I can strip him down and prepare him for the next assault on Snake. Hoping to get to REI later today for some new cables and brake pads (thanks for the gift cert StevieMac) as both are in dire need of replacement. My slumlordess Hannah inquired about riding into Joelton so she could mail some stuff, but I had intended on riding to Springfield then to Ridgetop to pay the speeding ticket (first one in 20 years, dammit!) I got before Christmas. So around 2:15PM I stop tinkering with Black Death and got ready to ride, realizing that City Hall closes at 3:30. So my ride with Hannah turned into a time trial to Ridgetop for me. I waited for Hannah in Ridgetop then we rode home in the freezing rain, my hands bearing the brunt of the cold.

Once home I was greeted with a hot cup of homemade cocoa from H. and stood near the gas heater to thaw out. I'm loving the new tires on the road bike. It's refreshing being able to ride down a slippery wet descent and not worry bout the bald, gashed open tires failing. Feeling a craving for Sushi, I decided upon Papa Chen's for my birthday dinner (all you can eat for $9) then chilled out on the couch with a night of Pixar films.

Slumlord Joe and Slumlordess Hannah surprised me with a Hannah made cake (carrot with coconut, jealous 8Ball?) around 10, so I popped some beers and enjoyed the company and cake. Like I said, rich with friends.

Resolute

Sitting on the couch listening to Kings of Leon's 'Only By The Night' album ( a little pre-birthday iTunes gift to myself) I've been reflecting upon the last week and the past year in general. Many changes, many new friends, some lost friends. 08 was one hell of a ride.

Normally I'd write up some sort of race recap from Snake, being the first Sunday in January, but I think I'll pass at the moment. I didn't achieve my 3:45 goal, but not for lack of trying or fitness. There's a lot about my effort and result that I'm happy with and going to hold close to my chest for the time being. Sodium Pentathol be damned.

H. and I drove up to the frozen North to visit with the family over the New Year Holiday. It was a great visit. Dad got me a Red Ryder BB Gun (sorry no compass in the stock) and my brothers and I had a good time shooting in the back yard. Nick didn't even shoot his eye out, though he had some trouble with putting his thumb over the site. A.J. nipped the Deadeye Dick award for his bullseye. We got my Grandma Hoffman a small present for Christmas intending to make her happy, but in doing so, succeeded in making her cry. She felt badly due to not getting us anything (she'd told everyone not to buy gifts this year). She's lonely and I feel badly for her. I wish home were closer to me. Twice a year visits just aren't enough time to get to spend with all the family. I'm going to resolve to keeping in touch better with the grandparents this year.

Rather than recapping the year, I'm going to give out some props to a few small businesses that went above and beyond for me this year. They all make great products, have incredible customer support, and are deserving of much more appreciation than I can show them. I consider each of them friends, despite only email conversations with many.

Epic Designs: Product find of the year for me. Eric Parsons was heading out for a trip when I inquired about ordering a bag for Trans Iowa. Despite a short time frame, me not getting the check mailed out as early as I'd hoped, he delivered before he even had hold of my check. The frame bag is my favorite way to haul gear on the long rides and races. Performs flawlessly and has me dreaming up a few more custom gear bags to order. Hand made in the USA (Alaska even).

Walz Caps: Jen and Co are the bomb. I'm never without a Walz cap, if it's not on my head it's in my pocket or in the lid pocket of my messenger bag. Best hats out there, period. Hand made with a splash of love in the USA (over on that West coast of ours).

Swiftwick Socks: Even though they sponsor me through product (enjoying testing some of their killer arm warmers at the moment), I love to baffle the heads of state in the company by ordering and paying for my socks. The socks are just that good. Sharpie and Grant aren't too bad either. Made in the USA (TN in fact).

Now, if you'll excuse me, I have a filthy bike to tend to and new brake cables, housing, and pads to install.